Want To Get Married Later In Life?

Jun 05, 2011 No Comments »

If you are not yet married, but would like to be…no worries! People who get married later in life are more likely to live together beforehand and know what they are getting into. The relationship is also more likely to last and less likely to divorce.

Last month the US Census Bureau reported that the median age of people getting married for the first time in the 1950′s was 23 for men and 20 for women. But, in 2009 the median age for first time marriage was 28 for men and 26 for women. They also reported that marriages are lasting longer and more than half of married couples are together after 15 years, more than a third are together 25 years, and the rest are married more than 50 years. The vast majority of people get married, but while marriage used to be the first step into adulthood, it is now often the last. For many reasons, I believe that is a good step in the right direction.

Immature people tend to have immature relationships which often leads to unhappiness. When people take the time to figure out what they truly want out of life, and especially from a romantic relationship, they are more likely to be satisfied. Delaying marriage gives people time for education, the chance to grow their careers, and enables them to achieve personal goals without having to make sacrifices for the marriage. If you are still looking for the person you’d like to grow old with… chances are they are still looking for you as well!

Until Next Time,

Tracey L. Steinberg, Esq.
Life Coach and Dating Expert
www.LifeCoachTracey.com

What Is The Worst That Could Happen?

May 17, 2011 No Comments »

The worst thing that can happen is not that you fail, it is that you think of yourself as a failure and give up.

Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, Steven Spielberg was placed in a learning disabled class, and JK Rowling’s Harry Potter manuscript was rejected by 12 publishing houses before the books set records as the fastest selling books in history. Everyone who has ever achieved something great, has had to persevere through rejections.

Setbacks are an inevitable part of everyone’s life. In order to achieve your goals, you must embrace moments of failure along the way and see them as necessary stops on the way to success. If you are one of the many people who assume that successful people don’t experience failure, read over the second paragraph a few more times.

Everybody has moments of failure, especially the people you think of as super successful. The difference between people who succeed at a goal and people who fail at a goal is that the successful people are willing to pick themselves and try again. Victories come from perseverance and there’s always a chance to try again.

Until Next Time,

Tracey L. Steinberg, Esq.
Life Coach and Dating Expert
www.LifeCoachTracey.com

How to be Magnetic

Apr 24, 2011 No Comments »

Let me tell you this right off the bat, being magnetic is NOT about looking like Scarlett Johansson or Ryan Reynolds. If it was those two would have happily married at birth and stayed married.

The secret to being magnetic is to live in the moment and bring your full attention to the good in whomever you are with. Pleasured people are magnetic because they see the good in others and look for ways to make moments more pleasurable for themselves and everyone around them.

When I first meet many of my clients, they tell me that their lives “should” be different (i.e.. they “should” be married by now). But, when you focus your thoughts on what you don’t have, you miss the very opportunities that you want to attract.

So, what can you do to become more magnetic?

You can start by spending some of your precious time appreciating the good that is in your life right now. Then, I encourage you to interact more with the people around you in a positive way. You could smile and say “hi,” or you can do something kind like offering your seat on the train.

When you can easily see the good in your own life and in others, and you continuously look for ways to bring pleasure to yourself and everyone around you, you’ll be magnetic!

Until Next Time,

Tracey L. Steinberg, Esq.
Life Coach and Dating Expert
www.LifeCoachTracey.com

Why Treating a girl to a Meal at MacDonald’s Won’t Make Her Happy

Apr 15, 2011 No Comments »

Once a co-worker of mine went out on a date with a new guy, and he took her to McDonald’s for a Dollar Menu. McDonald’s! Dollar Menu! On their first date! Did I mention McDonald’s? When she looked doubtful (what girl wouldn’t?), he started quoting all the specials from Monday to Sunday, as if he’s letting her in on the greatest money-saving secret. My co-worker, a shoeaholic, ran as fast as her Jimmy Choos would allow her to.

But seriously, it has nothing to do with materialism. See, in economics there’s a communication technique called Signalling. The idea is that you could tell a lot about a company by its actions, without a word ever being said. Companies send signals to the market through their own behaviours (investing in R&D, firing their management, etc.), and the market will react accordingly (favourably or otherwise).

When a guy takes a girl out for an ultra cheap meal, what he’s really telling her is that he’s not that interested in investing in her, or impressing her. If he can’t be bothered to at least pretend to value her in the beginning, what do you think will happen three months down the road? There’s being financially responsible, and there’s being cheap. Also, if he’s this cheap with money, he could be stingy on the emotional level too.

No guys are going to tell you these things straight up (they might not even admit it to themselves), so it’s up to the girls to be observant and figure it out themselves. If the guy spends the whole date bitching about his ex-wife, it might be a signal that he’s too bitter to start a new relationship. If he’s still living at home, it might be a signal that he doesn’t want to grow up, and would expect you to take care of him like his mama. Run!

Until Next Time,

Ms. Lulu

For more information, please visit my blog at www.theeconoflove.blogspot.com/

Portfolio Diversification #1: How To Do Ethical Investing In The Dating Market

Apr 01, 2011 No Comments »

Most financial advisors recommend the strategy of Portfolio Diversification. That means don’t put all your eggs in one basket. That’s because at any point in time, some stocks will go up while the others go down. Since no one ever truly knows which will be which (otherwise we’d all be stinking rich), buying a little bit of everything will yield the best overall return. Some of the good ones will cancel out the bad ones, and your risk exposure is reduced.

This concept works for dating as well. And with a few conditions, it’s also ethical. When I say ethical, I mean being respectful while protecting your own interest, and without being a player. These conditions are:

1. It’s the early stage of the dating game, i.e., casual dating.
2. No agreement of exclusiveness has been reached.
3. No sex is involved with any of the potentials (it just gets too yucky otherwise).

Now that the ground rules are established, let’s look at the many advantages of Portfolio Diversification:

1. Interacting with a variety of guys gives you a baseline of what guys are like, so when you’re in a relationship you’ll know:
a. If an issue is a “you & him” thing, or a “Mars & Venus” thing.
b. What’s normal (no not every guy expects rides to the bar from their girls).
2. You could say that you didn’t marry the first guy who asked.
3. You might begin with five guys. But after a week four of them could drop out of the race already. You might discover there’s just no spark, he has a wife living in the attic, etc. Starting with a bunch could save you time and energy.
4. Having other options keeps the sting out of rejections, since you’ll always get a call from somebody.
5. It takes the pressure off from I MUST MAKE THIS WORK. No, he’s not the only man on earth. Take your time and choose carefully.

One thing though: create a spreadsheet to keep track of who’s who. When a guy doesn’t work out, do a Strikethrough and hide his row. But don’t delete it. Why? You’ll want to remember exactly why it didn’t work out, because his online profile might get “rebranded” in a couple of months and looks delicious all over again. You don’t want to say: “Oh NOW I remember why I dumped him!” midway through yet another boring date.

Until Next Time,

Ms. Lulu

For more information, please visit my blog at www.theeconoflove.blogspot.com