Once, while on the phone with a stunning woman I met, I did something very powerful and simple. You can too.
Here’s how the conversation went:
Me: I watched this really amazing author of a book called Hero of a Thousand Faces. You ever hear of it?
Me: This guy is BRILLIANT, he talked about how there is one story in our mythology that connects all of mankind, among ALL races, all religions, all cultures, since the beginning of TIME. I was so fascinated, I couldn’t stop watching… (knowing she’s an intellectual, I knew she admires anyone who can educate her as well as tie mystical shit together)
Her: Wow, that sounds really interesting…
Me: That reminds me – do you have a library card?
Her: Yeah, I think I do. Why?
Me: Awesome – do me favor. You’re alot closer than I am, so next time you’re in the area, stop by the library for me and borrow the DVD’s and I can return it later. It’s called The Power of Myth, by Joseph Campbell. Do you have a pen?
Her: Huh? Um… not sure…
Me: It’s okay, there’s no huge rush. I just love his work and you can check it out too, if you want. Before I pick it up. It’s Joseph Campbell, The Power of Myth. I can text it to you later.
Me: Bla bla (Change subject…)
Basically, I knew this woman would (probably) never actually do this. But just asking her is so powerful and sends all the right signals for a couple reasons.
It’s a funny thing. People like people they’ve spent time with, spent money on, created an emotional connection with or went through tough times with… but why? Because when people have a vested interest in someone else, they automatically build a bond. By vested interest, of course, I mean they’ve INVESTED in you.
Ben Franklin used to use this tactic as a successful ambassador.
He used to write about how he would do this in negotiations by asking the other diplomat if he could borrow a book from them. Even if he already READ the book, he would ask for it anyway, knowing they had it because they talked about it. Then, when the time came to return the book, Ben would gratefully thank them and by this time, the diplomat would have a bond created with good ol’ Ben.
Hey, if it’s good enough for Ben, do you think it might be good enough for YOUR dating life?
Try it, you got nothing to lose and maybe a few DVDs to gain…
Until Next Time,
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