Common Sense for the 1st encounter/date

Mar 31, 2010 No Comments »

Singles, getting together for your 1st encounter or date, here are a few “do’s and don’ts:

DO’S;

• Get there on time.
• Put some effort into what you look like, 1st impressions count!
• Smile
• Send a quick email after the date, whether it went well or not…politeness is always appreciated.

DON’TS:

• Drink too much!
• Talk about your ex’s!!!
• Talk excessively about your kids or pets, seriously ….nobody else wants to hear about them for an hour!
• Talk about your favorite position or sex toy. (It’s a tad early don’t you think?)

The first date is about getting to know someone. So be a good listener. Ask questions, and from those answers you’re asking more questions….you want to know what you have in common from being a sushi lover to what’s their favourite movie, are they into are, “Lost”, literature, or are they couch potatoes or night owls and party the night away.
Be yourself, enjoy and remember….be with someone that makes you laugh!
Chemistry, it’s there or it’s not. If you’re not feeling the fuzzies, or desire and curiosity to kiss the one in front of you, the physical chemistry isn’t there. Physical chemistry doesn’t grow…..So depending on what you want….you go forward or not.

Keep a 1st date short (meet over coffee) and if you want to get together, make a plan already…don’t get into those “rules” and if neither one does call – they’re simply not into you!!! Move on!

Terri Giosia
Wellness-Lifestyles Coach

www.terrigiosia.com

Cooking for One: Savory Supper Recipes

Mar 30, 2010 No Comments »

Singleedition.com Cooking for number one? These savory gourmet supper recipes are sure to satisfy solo diners! Chef and food media personality and promoter Karine Backhoum, who appears regularly as a judge on the Iron Chef, prepared three cooking for one recipes for SingleEdition.com readers.

Endive, Grape and Walnut Salad With Crumbled Gorgonzola Cheese

Endive salad is a great choice for inividual who are cooking for one as you can purchase one or two stalks, which is enough for one meal. They are best purchased fresh and crisp. I like to mix them with apples or grapes for added sweetness, and walnuts or pecans are a wonderful accent for texture and added health benefits. Depending on your mood, you can serve with crumbled blue cheese, gorgonzola, feta, goat or just about any cheese you like. These days all of these cheeses come in small containers and are already crumbled for easy use and storage when cooking for one.

Recipe Serves One Person

Ingredients:
One or two Belgium Endives
6 to 8 red grapes cut in half lengthwise
¼ cup walnuts – halved
1 TBS crumbled Gorgonzola or shaved Parmesan or cheese of your choice
Kosher Salt – to taste
Freshly ground black pepper – to taste
1 TBS Balsamic Vinegar – or to taste
2 TBS Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Method:
Remove any damaged or bruised Endive leaves from the outer stalks and discard. Remove 4 to 6 more stalks and line a glass bowl or bowl of your choice with the stalks. Slice the remaining endive in ½ inch circles and place in mixing bowl. Add grapes, walnuts and cheese. Season with salt and pepper, and drizzle Balsamic Vinegar and Extra Virgin Olive oil.

To Serve:
Toss ingredients together then add to serving bowl with endive stalks. You can eat right out of the bowl. Bon Appétit.

Filet Mignon au Poivre with Sautéed Spinach and Baked Fingerling Potatoes

When cooking for one person it is best to either cook something you can then re-serve for another meal or freeze or, as in the case of this recipe, something you can buy by the piece. Most gourmet markets or butchers and fish mongers will sell one piece of steak or one chicken breast, and it is usually fresher than at the grocery store which does not normally sell things by the piece.

If you are cooking for one, treat yourself to a great steak dinner with a wonderful bottle of Bordeaux wine, some great music, a Netflix movie or a new episode of 24 and enjoy yourself and this marvelous meal.

Recipe Serves One Person

Ingredients:
1 4-to-6 oz Filet Mignon steak
¼ cup cream
1 TBS Dijon Mustard
2 TBS Cognac
Kosher Salt to taste
Cracked Black Pepper to taste
1 tsp unsalted butter

Potatoes
4 to 6 fingerling potatoes (or any small potatoes)
1 TBS Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Kosher Salt to taste
Cracked Black Pepper to taste
1 TBS Herbs de Provence or Mixed Italian Herbs

Spinach
2 cups of Spinach leaves
2 garlic cloves
1 TBS Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Kosher Salt to taste
Cracked Black Pepper to taste

Method:
Potatoes
Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Wash and dry potatoes. Toss potatoes in a bowl with olive oil, salt, pepper and herbs until they are well covered. Place in small roasting pan and cook for 20 minutes or until knife penetrates through potato easily. While the potatoes are roasting, season the filet mignon with salt and pepper (and add any herbs of your choice such as thyme or rosemary). Let sit at room temperature until potatoes have cooked at least 10 to 15 minutes and are almost ready.

Spinach
While potatoes are roasting, wash and dry baby spinach leaves. Add olive oil to medium heated sauté pan with garlic cloves. Toss in spinach and cover pan. Reduce heat and wait until spinach is wilted. Season with salt and a squeeze of fresh lemon and stir. Cover and leave on very low heat.

Filet Mignon
Place cast iron pan, or heavy sauté pan, over medium to high heat. When fully heated, add small amount of unsalted butter (1/2 tsp) and place seasoned Filet Mignon in pan. Cook for about 3 minutes for rare, 5 for medium rare and longer for well done. Turn over and cook an additional 3 to 4 minutes for rare (depending on how thick the meat). A perfect way to check is by touching the meat with your finger. If it is very soft it is rare, if it is soft it’s medium rare and firm is medium to well done.

Remove steak from pan and let rest for a minute or two. While resting, put another ½ tsp of butter in the pan and add the mustard. Let cook for 30 seconds, add cognac. Let cook for 30 more seconds or until the alcohol is cooked out. Add cream and season with salt and pepper. Stir until a rich golden color over low heat.

To Serve:
Remove potatoes from the oven. Let sit. Place steak with spinach and roasted fingerling potatoes on a plate. Pour cognac cream sauce over the steak. Bon Appétit.

Baked Apple with Cognac

While you are baking your potatoes or roasting anything in your oven, you might as well take advantage of the use of energy and make the most of it. A baked apple is a delicious and healthy dessert and very easy to make if you are cooking for on. It’s the ideal treat for the solo diner.

Recipe Serves One Person

Ingredients:
1 medium to large golden delicious or Gala Apple
1 tsp sweet butter
2 TBS brown sugar
¼ tsp cinnamon (optional)
¼ tsp ground cloves (optional)
1 TBS cognac
1 scoop French Vanilla Ice cream – if you like your apple a la mode

Method:
Preheat oven to 375 degrees. In a small baking dish, place your cored apple with butter, sugar and seasoning sprinkled inside and around the apple. Cook for 20 minutes. Add cognac and cook another 10 to 15 minutes or until the apple is thoroughly cooked. Let sit before eating.

To Serve:
Serve as is in a bowl or martini glass. Add a scoop of vanilla ice cream or candied walnut ice cream or flavor of your choice.

Enjoy the meal!

Here are some more great recipes that serve one person:

Chicken, Spinach and Blue Cheese Pizza

Roast Bone-In, Skin On Chicken Breasts with Herb Butter

Pigs in Blankets

Some Days You Just Don’t Feel Like Doing It

Mar 26, 2010 No Comments »

Singleedition.com It’s raining, it’s pouring and the last thing anyone wants to do right now is hit the pavement running for 30 minutes of cardio, especially if you’re doing it alone. Starting an exercise program to keep fit is one thing, but staying with the program and keeping your motivation level high is another. Find out how you can stay on track when there is no one pushing you to succeed.

1. Plan a Kedge: Chris Crowley, author of the best selling book “Younger Next Year Journal,” encourages readers to practice a technique which he has termed kedging. According to Crowley, a kedge (based on an old nautical term meaning “pulling forward”) is a special fitness event/reward that will help keep you focused during those challenging times so you do not throw in the exercise towel. Kedges can be serious motivators during your daily workout routines and can help individuals stay on their fitness track. In other words, you can be moving forward or looking forward to your kedge, which might be a luxurious biking trip in Italy, a cheap and bohemian-chique Yoga retreat, a weekend intensive or a weeklong vacation, but striving to get to that kedge should be challenging.

2. Try Teaming Up: A fitness club need not necessarily be confinded to a gym, as you can take your workout beyond those four walls. One of the advantages of hooking up with a local club or organization like Road Runners or leagues such as ZogSports in New York City is that you don’t have to plan ahead. Just show up and follow the crowd for an awesome workout.

3. Find Power in People: It’s easy to get into a funk when you are pulling all the weight alone. If you schedule yourself in to attend a couple of group fitness classes a week, think Spin, Cardio Kickbox and/or Total Body Conditioning, there’s a good chance you will benefit from the collective energy.

4. Enlist a Buddy: Showing up is the first step to staying in shape, and finding a friend with whom you can work out can make it easier when it comes to goal setting, companionship and accountability. Check out FitnessBuddies.com, Craigslist.com, WeightWatchers.com and other local message boards to find a partner who can cheer you on.

5. Get Digital Aid: From mobile training apps to personal fitness portals there are programs that will push, prompt and propel you every step of the way. iTRAIN™ take personalized conditioning to a whole new level by allowing users to download personalized workouts with famous Hollywood trainers onto any MP3 player. And if you’re an iPhone user, you’re in luck. Here are a few of the top performing apps that will get you in gear: GymGoal ABC, iFitness, FitnessBuilder, iTreadmill.

How To Get Inside Someone’s Head (and Bed)

Mar 23, 2010 No Comments »

By Ruta Fox from Singleedition.com My friend J. Michael gave me some sage advice. Since he’s great looking, a former pro athlete and single in NYC, I figured he’d been in and out of more than a few beds (and heads) in his time. He says his grandfather, (a steel mill workin’, Harley drivin’, huntin’ and fishin’, shot and a beer kinda guy), imparted some priceless wisdom that still holds true today. So here goes, some simple tips for both sexes to incorporate into their dating agenda.

Guys learn this:

Cuddles and compliments. Give her what J. Michael calls “cuddles and compliments.”  We know men are visual, and women fall in love more with their ears. So learn to say something positive, like “you look adorable in that” or “I love it when you wear your hair that way.” It’s not hard, and it’s free. Throw in a really nice thing once a week, like leave her a note, pick up wine or flowers on the way over.  You’ll thank J. Michael. A lot.

Circulate. Casually dating several girls at once is OK, dating several girls within the same few block radius, zip code or neighborhood is asking for trouble. Her friends, your neighbors or the bartender will rat you out. Or, worst case scenario, you could bump into Natalia when you’re with Fredrika. Not pretty.

Give her a massage. Not a physical massage, but a “ mental massage.” Try using some big words, women are impressed by intellect, not necessarily intelligence. Meaning they don’t want to date an ass, (but they might want to hook up with somebody that has a nice one!). Intellectual stimulation begets intriguing conversation, so an elegant, creative, original rap will wow her. And, don’t forget, making her laugh is the BEST route
to an actual massage.

Love her shoes. The love that dares not speak its name.  Guys, please understand most women have an obsessive and delusional love of handbags and shoes.  Having ten pairs of black high heels, each one just a tad different, makes perfect sense to her. Not to you. To her. She’ll probably notice your shoes right away, so go the distance and spend some time pulling yourself together.

Wrestle your ego to the floor. Make a real effort to listen to her, make eye contact, nod and then ask questions. No interrupting. Shut up about your boat, your house in the country, your trust fund, and blabbering constantly about YOURSELF.  It’s more attractive to just be aloof, and interested in HER.

Don’t lobby. Just because you’re in a powerful position, don’t connive to keep the relationship going by telling her, “I can help you professionally or socially.” A girl either likes you or she doesn’t, even if she accepts your gifts, and goes on a few dates with you –if she doesn’t like you, she doesn’t like you. She’s probably sleeping with your personal trainer, anyway.

Women learn this:

Flatter his ego. Men are, at the heart of it, as insecure as anyone, even though they would never admit it. Throw them a compliment on something they do well, whether it’s moving money or moving furniture around all day. Saying something nice makes them feel great. Maybe it’s their cool jacket, the way they treated your Mom, or how they scored points on the basketball court, dishing out a compliment is so easy and makes them feel like you think they’re awesome.

Guys are visually driven. Look in the mirror. Yah, really look, front back and sides, (and not in the skinny mirror that slices off ten pounds). You don’t have to be a supermodel, all women have something beautiful. Guys notice, and their memories are like a vault, truthfully they never forget, so dress accordingly. Eyes, hair, lips and then the rest. Capture a guy’s imagination, and you’ve got ‘em.

Aim to be happy.  When you are happy with you, men are happy with you. If you’re always talking about what it’s gonna take to make you happy, just stop talking about it and do it. If you’re constantly whining about losing five pounds to be happy, then start that workout, or better yet ask your guy to help. J.Michael says men are goal oriented creatures, and they love to fix things. And when it comes to arguing, aim to be happy rather than right.

Men tell the truth if provoked. As Jack Nicholson warned Tom Cruise, “you can’t handle the truth.” So be careful when you ask for it, because he might just give it to you when backed into a corner.

Guys are not your girlfriend. So don’t treat them like one. Although the lines have been blurred in recent years, and men and women are BFFs, pals and buddies, etc. please keep super personal details to yourself for a bit, such as grooming rituals, pills you are popping, your progress in years of therapy, etc.

Drop him a line. Devote some time to learning goofy guy stuff like famous film lines such as Wedding Crasher’s “don’t take a turn to negative town” or Arnold’s “I’ll be back.” All guys throw lines around from movies — not sure why they think it’s fun, maybe it’s genetic.

Ruta Fox is the CEO of divinediamonds.com, and the creator of The Ah Ring, the first and only diamond ring designed for single women.

How to Make Them Talk, Not Walk: Five Rules to Encourage Conversation

Mar 17, 2010 No Comments »

By Yvonne Chase from SingleEdition.com

Some people are natural talkers. They have the knack, or, as the Irish like to say, the gift of gab. For most people, starting a conversation with a total stranger is scary, especially with the opposite sex! In impromptu discussions you may be the one starting the conversation or you may be the one approached, and if you are not the type who is a natural talker those situations may scare the heck out of you.
Others find that they are fine with casual chats but when they’re on a first date they feel awkward. They don’t know how to talk with their date in a way that makes the other person feel comfortable enough to divulge their inner thoughts and opinions. Either way, to start and maintain a conversation takes a little skill—and a lot of practice. If you weren’t blessed with the gift of gab and the ability to talk to anyone about anything, here are some great tips to help you.

Tip One: Be interested. Initiating a casual conversation is not as difficult as it seems. Start every conversation with only one intention—to “chat” for a few minutes or get another’s take on the current situation. Simple, short, engaging sentences are best: “You look like you’re having a good time,” or “You look like your having a lousy time.” Stay current on current events. Share an interesting experience; what it meant to you, how it changed your life, what you learned from it etc. Look the person in the eye when you speak, smile and keep your attitude easy and breezy.

Tip Two: Be interesting. The more interesting your own life is, the more topics you have at your disposal to discuss. Take a class, read about a subject you are interested in but know little or nothing about. Keep expanding your life and your knowledge base. Not only does it make your life and mind fuller, it makes you a more interesting person to talk to.

Tip Three: Be approachable. Women complain that men don’t take any initiative to chat them up. There are a few reasons why men keep their distance. The most obvious is inapproachability. If you are standing with a posture that says “leave me alone,” guess what? Men will leave you alone. If your face is tight with fear, hostility or desperation, your body language is telling others to stay away. So unfold those arms from your chest and make it a point to exude a relaxed, friendly posture and SMILE. Now I’m not asking you to stand around with a huge grin pasted on your face like Ms. America, but you can let a soft easy smile touch your lips and allow your body to relax.

Tip Four: Leave the rat pack at home. Standing in a tight clutch of girlfriends whispering and giggling is a sight to strike fear into the heart of the bravest of man. George, a single man on the dating scene agrees. If I’m out at a lounge or restaurant and see an attractive woman that catches my eye with a bunch of girlfriends, I don’t say a word because I feel like I’m intruding and I don’t want to be judged and critiqued by her girlfriends. If you are out and about and want to meet men, don’t take five of your girlfriends along, save that for girls night out and go alone. George says this, “When I see a woman out alone, it turns me on because it says she’s confident, enjoys her own company and can have a great time with or without a man. That is a woman I would definitely approach.” At the least, be bold enough to break away from your friends every so often on those girls nights out.

Tip Five: Avoid the RPS trap. Religion, Politics, Sex. Don’t discuss religion, politics or sex if you want to avoid hurt feelings and heated debates. These topics must come up at some point when you are getting to know someone, but they should not come up the first time you meet. Save heavy issues that deal with religion, politics and sex for a time when you have a better understanding of the other person’s views on such things.

Yvonne Chase is a dynamic, high-energy Dating Coach, affectionately known as “The Single Woman’s Cheerleader. You can visit her at AvailableandHappy.com or via email at: coachyvonne@availableandhappy.com