So you did it. You signed up for an online dating service, found a profile for the partner of your dreams, and set up a date. But now you are so nervous you can’t even breathe right. What are you going to talk about on your first date? Conversation is an issue that gets a lot of single people nervous. There’s nothing more awkward and uncomfortable than sitting through a dinner date with nothing to say, staring down at your plate and hoping for something to come along and break the silence.
Some single people remain single because they can’t seem to find the right words when they are on a date. There’s nothing that will put you strides ahead of other single people than conversational skills. We’re all prone to those awkward silences and uncomfortable pauses on first dates. Learn how to talk to him or her without blowing it and you’re sure to get a ticket out of singledom in no time.
When you are talking to your date, you don’t want to leave things to fate. Don’t flail blindly hoping that what you say may possibly, hopefully, result in a second date. The key is to use charm and stay in control. This does not mean controlling the entire conversation and talking too much. Many single people fail right then and there. In an attempt to fill up the quietness, many single people become blabber mouths, which only turns off their dates. Even if you think your date is impressed because he or she is nodding and acting interested, don’t be fooled. Single people may act polite and pretend they actually care about what you have to say in order not to be rude.
So that brings us to the most important conversation tip for single people: don’t talk too much! Single people are far more interested in listening to what they themselves have to say. Your aim should be to ask questions that get your date talking. When your date talks, you just have to become an active listener. Single people can listen to themselves talk for hours and they will talk to you about themselves as long as you are willing to listen.
Rather than worrying about what your date is going to say next, focus on what your date is saying now. Listen hard because your date is most likely giving you plenty of opportunities to ask more questions and get the conversation going. Unfortunately, single people tend to focus so much on how they are being perceived that they don’t pay attention to what their dates are saying. The key is to listen closely to what your date has to say and you will find plenty of opportunities to feed the conversation.
Single people will also give you signs of whether they are interested in you or not during conversation. If your date is not giving you any conversational cues whatsoever, it could be because he or she is not attracted to you. If you try your best and you still can’t manage to get more than one word answers from your date, then you’ll probably have to accept defeat.
In addition to actively listening to what your date has to say, you must also talk a little about yourself so your date can get to know you. Single people can successfully get their dates to become attracted to them by creating many “me too!” moments. When your date talks about how much he or she likes something, you can respond by agreeing and talking about how much you also enjoy it. Combining active listening with conversation that makes your date think that you two have a lot in common will help you make a great impression and score a second date.
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